BY Irene Kaoru
August 3, 2007
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Admit it. Sex is everywhere–even places it’s not supposed to be. Irene Kaoru peers into the world of the accidentally sexy.

This August, over 400 Wal-Mart stores across the nation will be bringing us a new line of religious action figures marketed toward families for whom Barbie and GI Joe are just too secular.

“We’re seeing interest from parents in faith-enriching toys,” says Melissa O’Brien, a Wal-Mart spokeswoman.

I might be tempted to classify this as some backlash against the increasingly sexualized nature of children’s toys, especially toys for young girls (those kinderslut Bratz dolls come to mind), if these action figures didn’t look like Tom of Finland characters come to deliciously smutty life. Homosexual sublimation maybe? Does anyone else remember that part in Angels in America that goes on and on about how hot it is in the Bible when Jacob wrestles with the angel? That would make a great toy. I’m sure Wal-Mart would approve.