BY Richard Blakeley
May 20, 2008
7,263 views
9 Comments

Are you having a difficult time scoring with hot chicks? If you said yes, then worry no more. I have come up with an innovative and easy to use 5 point checklist that will get you laid in no time at all! Best of all? You only don’t even need all 5 points — employing just one of the the following methods should be enough to have you drowning in poon.

Option #1: Be More Attractive
Girls tend to like tall guys with rugged features, symmetrical faces and strong jawlines. Remember, no one wants to have sex with someone they’re not attracted to. So if you’re ugly, you should try and be more attractive.

Option #2: Be Rich
Money can solve many problems — but did you know it can also help you score? If you’re poor, chances are chicks aren’t going to want to do you. I suggest winning the lottery or inventing something that makes you millions of dollars. The simple rule of thumb is that the more money you have, the more likely girls are going to want to bone you. Get as much money as you possibly can.

Option #3: Become Famous
As Mr. T said, “Be a somebody or be somebody’s fool!” I, too, pity the fool who can’t score cause he’s not famous. So become famous. It’s actually rather simple to do. You could do something nobody else has done before, or you could try becoming a professional athlete or rock star. There are hundreds of famous people out there. Just do what they do, and you should be golden.

Option #4: Acquire A Larger Penis
Whether you’re talking about the square footage of your SoHo loft or your SUV, size does matter. It’s a well known scientific fact that the size of one’s penis is determined by your parents’ genes. If you aren’t well endowed, you should strongly consider acquiring new, genetically blessed parents. After all, a little angel hair pasta noodle won’t get the girls talking about how large your sen yai is… if you know what I’m talking about.

Option #5: Be Younger
Unless you’ve checked off any of options 1-4, you’ll probably score less with chicks as time goes on. So really, it’s just best not to age. If you’ve already passed your 20’s, return to them as quickly as possible, ideally placing yourself somewhere between 24 and 28. This age range is perfect for getting laid because you’re old enough to know what you’re doing, and smart enough to know not to get deeply committed to anyone.